If you knew a person was cheating on their spouse would you tell them?
I know it seems like a very easy question to answer, but if you give it some thought it becomes quite difficult to just automatically say yes or no. You want to blurt out "yes" because that would be the right thing to do. However, do you really want to be the one to deliver the message that would devastate a marriage, a family, and the lives of innocent children? You risk damaging a family, even though you personally have nothing to do with the affair.
The "no" part of you wants to stay out of it because it isn't your business. If it isn't your spouse, you don't care to get involved. You know that eventually the secret will be out and you will have had nothing to do with any of the devastation that follows.
So, you're probably wondering what my answer is....
I choose to plead the 5th!! ;)
Honestly, I don't know if I would tell the betrayed spouse. I'm sure some are saying "how could you not, you've lived it?" You're right, I have lived it, and its hell. I wouldn't want to be the one to drop that bomb, BUT it depends on the situation. If it was someone I knew that had a history of cheating I would feel the truth, even if it was from me, was necessary. The first thing I would do is talk to the person having the affair, knowing me I would give them an ultimatum. You tell or I tell!
The "no" part of you wants to stay out of it because it isn't your business. If it isn't your spouse, you don't care to get involved. You know that eventually the secret will be out and you will have had nothing to do with any of the devastation that follows.
So, you're probably wondering what my answer is....
I choose to plead the 5th!! ;)
Honestly, I don't know if I would tell the betrayed spouse. I'm sure some are saying "how could you not, you've lived it?" You're right, I have lived it, and its hell. I wouldn't want to be the one to drop that bomb, BUT it depends on the situation. If it was someone I knew that had a history of cheating I would feel the truth, even if it was from me, was necessary. The first thing I would do is talk to the person having the affair, knowing me I would give them an ultimatum. You tell or I tell!
I feel that it's not my place to interfere in someone else's business, especially their marriage. As much as I would want someone to tell me I don't know that I could be the one to return the favor. I've had someone withhold the truth from me and while I was upset with her at the time, I do understand why she chose to remain quiet. It's a delicate situation and one that if not handled correctly could possibly end friendships, crumble lives and result in anger and bitterness for all parties involved.
They say that honesty is the best policy, and it is. However, when it comes to dealing with other people's business I feel that sometimes it is best to take the "sit back and watch it unfold" approach. You can be there to help pick up the pieces.
They say that honesty is the best policy, and it is. However, when it comes to dealing with other people's business I feel that sometimes it is best to take the "sit back and watch it unfold" approach. You can be there to help pick up the pieces. 
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